What happens when we lose our focus and how can we regain it?

Brain neurological studies now give us a clearer picture of what happens when we lose our normal self control. A primitive part of human brains, called the amygdala, is the equivalent of the lizard’s brain. Its main function is to insure our survival by helping us notice dangerous situations and respond lightening fast with fight or flight actions. Thousands of years ago, this was crucial. If we saw a tiger, we had to react fast. In a split second we had to recognize the danger and decide to run or fight.

In such cases, the amygdala takes over the brain and directs blood to the arms and legs. Why? So we can run or fight. The brain has done its job so blood is rushed out of the brain. This reaction to danger still happens and it still saves our lives. For example, if we are lost in thought and step off the curb in front of a bus, the amygdala takes over and we jump back on the curb. We did not reason this over. It was instantaneous.

Now the problem is that this happens many other times too and gets us into trouble in the office. Lack of anger control is one of the main problems executives are asked to solve through executive coaching. Do you sometimes lose it in office situations and say things you regret later? Probably, you perceived someone as threatening you in an emotional way. Then your amygdala took over and caused you to fight with an aggressive comment.

Sometimes the same thing happens to the other person. Then the argument escalates. Each person gets angrier and says more forceful, often derogatory things. In comedies, the actors sometimes go on to physically wreck something of the other person’s, who then retaliates in kind. As we laugh the actors tear each other’s belongings to pieces. Why do we laugh? Because the comedy exaggerates something that happens to us all the time – a fight escalating.

Or your amygdala may cause you to flee by physically avoiding a person or emotionally withdrawing. But in fact you may need to confront this person.

The amygdala cannot reason it through. It is not that sophisticated. The part of the brain that reasons is the frontal cortex. But it has been hijacked by the amygdala. We sometimes say, “He lost his head.” Right, his extra blood left his brain in favor of his arms and legs. This ancient reaction did not help in his office situation.

Now what can you do about this? Learn to notice sooner when you are beginning to get upset and learn ways to cool off. More about this in my next Tips.

Learn more about keeping your focus in my Virtual-Workshop,Leadership Communication™, described at: http://www.EmotionallyIntelligentLeadership.com/index.htm#bottom/ - scroll down.