On the job we need to have both power and caring. Consider this quote by Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr.:

“What is needed is a realization that power without love is reckless and abusive, and love without power is sentimental and anemic.”

What thoughts does this quote prompt in you? Your answers will be more important to you than mine. Take a moment to reflect.

I think that leaders need to be powerful, but with love or caring. We all need to be loving but with power too. We need to have both backbone and heart. Some call this tough love.

I am sure that you can think of leaders who tilt one way or the other. Some are powerful but lack caring. Their direct reports obey out of fear of consequences. Often they lack commitment. Other leaders show much caring but lack power to hold people accountable. Their direct reports may sometimes let things slide.

A good way to remember this is to ask yourself, “Am I being appropriately powerful and caring?”

We all have difficult people to deal with. Sometimes, we need to assert ourselves and stand up to them. This often works best if we have both backbone and heart. We have backbone to stand up to difficult people and hold those crucial conversations. And we have caring so that we can stay connected while we assert ourselves. We don’t harm the relationship.

If fact we can improve the relationship by surfacing conflicts and resolving them. Often, we need to use dialogue and listening skills rather than force. These are high level skills that most leaders need to improve.

I teach all these skills for leaders and professionals in my Group Executive Coaching Virtual-Workshop Program. For more information or a Complimentary Session, visit http://www.EmotionallyIntelligentLeadership.com